


Karushuu One Shots

by supercorncob



Series: The Parallel of Us [6]
Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: AU, Angst, Based off of a picture i saw, Crack, Fluff, Hitman AU, M/M, One Shot, Vampire AU, assassination classroom - Freeform, dying, karushuu, lol pride??, prince AU, prompt things, short one shots, sorry if it’s ooc
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-07 05:20:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 15
Words: 19,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26467834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supercorncob/pseuds/supercorncob
Summary: Some random Karushuu one shots that I decided to post on Instagram, and now I decided to post them here yes :)
Relationships: Akabane Karma/Asano Gakushuu, Karma Akabane/Gakushū Asano
Series: The Parallel of Us [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2191350
Comments: 29
Kudos: 100





	1. Man, Fuck Your Pride

“You know Asano, there are other ways to tell me that you miss me,” Karma hummed, not looking up from the book he was reading.   
“Oh shut up,” the younger male said, finally inside Karma’s room. He had taken the back window.   
“So why are you bothering me?” Karma let a little smirk on to his lips, he had just put some lip balm on too.   
“Homework of course,” his voice was as stern as always, and this made it all the more fun.   
“Does his highness need a tutoring session?” He put the book down, it was one about human flaws and insanity. He had stopped on a chapter called ‘Pride.’ Hubris, superiority complexes, all that jazz. He looked up at Asano.  
“Yes Akabane,” now he sounded genuinely amused, which was rare for someone as composed and fake as Gakushū. He took a step closer.  
“On which subject Asano-kun? I might need to do a diagnostic test or something,” he was hinting at something, and there was a gleam of something peculiar in his sunset coloured eyes.  
“Of course. Why kind of tutor wouldn’t,” for a moment Karma actually believed he was there for a lesson and that was because his had taken another tone, the one he used while addressing teachers. If it weren’t for Asano’s next, very sudden movements. He quickly placed a soft kiss on the redhead’s lips, which left Karma’s mouth in a smiling position after he pulled away. “So how’s that?” He his voice was a bit softer now, almost like the kiss. Karma pretended to think.  
“Not bad Asano,” he replied thoughtfully, allowing the smile to stay on his face, “A for effort. But I have some feedback,” he tilted his head to the side ever so slightly.  
“Hm?”  
“Next time, do it like this,” he stood up and pulled Asano’s face closer again, kissing him instead of leaving a peck on his lips. The action was returned with the same amount of aggressive energy. Karma liked it that way.   
“Aw you wore lip balm for me?” Asano mocked after they finally broke apart, “you didn’t have to go all out for me Karma,” and there it was. It was always a little weird when Asano called Karma by his first name, even if he was one of the only ones to actively use his last name. It made him feel...good? But this time it made him frown.   
  


“Shu,” he pouted, “what’s stopping you from calling me Karma?” He sounded more bothered than he admitted to being. It was Gakushu’s turn to frown. He took a seat on Karma’s bed before sighing.

“I don’t know,” he replied honestly, he figured that if Karma was going to let his guard down, he may as well too.

“Hm,” the redhead paused, “it’s fine Shū, really, I was just curious is all,” that was his feeble attempt to save himself from the embarrassment of being ridiculed by Asano for caring so much, but little did he know that Asano was thinking the same thing. 

“No no, I,” he put on his thinking face, “I’m scared I suppose,” he looked down, which both comforted and frightened Karma. 

“Of me?” He knew that probably wasn’t what he was afraid of, but he had to ask.

“No, not of you. Of what people will think,” he was blunt.

“So it’s your pride,” Karma had just read about this.

“I’d say it was my lack of, pride, but,” he looked up, “yes in a way.” Karma didn’t appreciate the solemn mood that had filled his room. He was going to try to make it better. 

“Sooo,” he started after a moment of silence, “your pride is stopping you from,” he stood up, “calling me Karma.” Gakushu nodded. “Your pride is stopping you from grabbing my hands in the hallways and making out with me,” he sounded amused and a bit too nonchalant.

“Yes Karma; and my dignity.”

“Okay okay, so your pride is stopping you from congratulating me on my higher test scores too?” Gakushu scowled. 

“I wouldn’t know. I don’t need to do that often,” there it was. Karma smiled again, and Asano copied the action.

“But your pride stops you from holding my hands,” he faked a frown, “even while my hands are probably the best thing you’ve ever held,” he was cocky. He stepped forward. 

“I’d much rather hold burning coal,” Asano laughed, “but yes,” he didn’t move back.

“And your pride is stopping you from doing this?” He grabbed his face and placed another kiss on the boy, lunging forward so that they’d fall on his bed, “every once in a while?”

Asano giggled, which was rare and a sound Karma would remember forever.

“Yes Karma. It’s my pride.” Karma shook his head and laughed a bit before kissing him again. Then when they broke apart, Karma whispered.

“Man, fuck your pride.”


	2. Your Descent to Madness has Affected Me Greatly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lol Karma be nuts

Sly, soft, and condescending. 

Gaskushu could still hear him edging him on, taunting him, mocking him. He could recall countless hours of back and forth arguments and debates with the redhead. He could recall the teasing he endured at lunch time in high school, the endless pranks and the laughter that came with it. Gakushu smiled at the memory of simpler times, when the same voice would pester him until he gave in and bought Karma some strawberry milk, or when they were studying in the library before Karma convinced him to get frozen yogurt. He decided those sounds would be the ones he’d keep with him for the remainder of his life; yes, the sounds he’d tie to Karma Akabane were going to be sounds of joy, mischief and pleasure. Because what kind of person would want to be remembered by the sound of their screams and sobs as insanity’s claim on them takes over to the point of no return? When the deafening shrieks caused by grief, guilt and sorrow was all he had left? Certainly not Karma. No, Karma would’ve wanted to be remembered the way Gakushū liked him best, as someone who was 

sly, (somewhat) soft, and condescending. Gakushu figures as much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah so this one was rlly short u might be able to find me on insta huh, that would be weird :) anyways, i’ll see y’all


	3. This Is No Time For Romance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Genre wars?

“You’re gonna watch a movie with me on Thursday after your judo lessons,” it wasn’t even a question. Asano blinked in response. “Well? If you don’t say anything I’ll assume that you’re coming,” it was the end of the day at school and Karma was ready to leave the godforsaken building, but he couldn’t do that until he got his answer. He had waited an extra thirty minutes to catch Gakushū as he was leaving a tutoring session to ask him the important question or rather to tell him about the changes to his Thursday schedule.  
“Excuse me?” The strawberry blond blinked again, “a movie?”  
“No a murder,” Karma looked unimpressed, he was under the impression that Asano had perfect hearing, “yes we’re going to watch a movie.”  
“Why?” He didn’t bother asking how Karma knew he had judo on Thursdays, he was still confused as to why Karma wanted to watch a movie with him. Karma of all people. Karma, who annoyed him just for the sake of annoying him.   
“Because we’re gonna watch a movie,” Karma was tempted to just leave and talk to him about it tomorrow, “I already picked the movie and got two tickets for 8:30,” he explained. Gakushu was baffled. Had Karma been stood up? Did he want to bring Gakushū to distract himself from how lonely he truly was?   
“Did your date decide you were too much to handle then Akabane?” He finally replied properly, with enough venom in his words to make Karma’s lips curl upwards. Finally, an Asano response. Now it was time to undo it.  
“Depends, do you think I’m too much to handle?” It didn’t take a genius to know what he was implying- and even if it did, Gakushū Asano was nothing short of a mastermind.   
“Are you asking me out?” He masked anything in his voice that would’ve hinted towards the amusement he felt stirring inside him. That boy really had the audacity.  
“What if I was?” Karma gave him a look that initiated one of their well known staring competitions.  
“Then it’s no surprise that you’re still single,” he laughed, and while Karma kept his smirk, he panicked internally. Had he just thrown away their perfect relationship for the chance at a date? Well it didn’t matter anymore, he had to go through with it now.

“Last I checked,” Karma hummed, “you were single too. Asano frowned.  
“That was your attempt at a pickup line I assume.” Karma cocked his head to the side and grinned.   
“Let’s say it was,” he looked the blond boy up and down, “is it working?”  
“That depends on your movie choice,” Asano played along, slowly growing curiouser and curiouser regarding Karma’s taste in music and how exactly the redhead handled dates. That was totally the only reason.   
“You’ll have to find out on Thursday,” Karma was glad to know that he had won.  
“The genre at least,” Karma stiffened.   
“Romance?” He felt his cheeks flush slightly.   
“Romance?” Asano laughed, “Karma Akabane, delinquent nerd, hopeless romantic?” Karma shifted his feet.  
“Classic Asano, too heartless for emotions,” Karma rolled his eyes after shaking off his prior embarrassment.

“Oh whatever do you mean?” The two of them had been talking long enough for Asano to reach level two: his sarcastic phase, “I’m sure I share your passion for rom coms, in fact I watched one yesterday with my friends,” he gave Karma his award winning smile, “we watched it with Ren’s dog actually,” he pouted, “she’s sick and won’t survive the winter,” he may have gone overboard. This time, Karma blinked in response.  
“It’s August,” he shook his head, “and any genre you’d pick would be lame. I don’t want to watch a documentary on the different regions of the brain, or whatever movie you’d watch,” Karma retorted.  
“I’m hurt,” he kept smiling, “tell you what, we’re going to watch a movie tonight,” Karma realized that even asking each other out had to be a competition, “I’ll pick the movie, and you can meet me there at 9.”  
“This is you asking me out,” Karma couldn’t help but smirk, “but Shu-chan, I asked first,” he then pouted, it was good enough to fool any old woman on the street, and it was good enough to make Gakushū cringe.   
“But Karma,” were those tears? In his eyes? Karma had to step up his gayme, “I wanted to see a murder,” he sounded insane, Karma loved that, “mystery,” he finished the sentence.   
“Aw, Shu-chan,” one day their sarcasm would get the best of them, “don’t cry, I’ll watch your movie with you,” he took the opportunity to squish Asano’s cheek. Then the change in Gakushu’s expression was enough to make Karma take a few steps back.  
“I’ll pick you up at 8:45. Be prepared for a murder mystery, and dress appropriately. If anyone asks, we’re there as friends. This is no time for romance Karma,” his face was stone cold until the last few words, “we can try that after exams.”

Even when Karma was the one to ask him out: Asano always had to win, didn’t he?


	4. We Could Be Legendary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lol get rekt

“We could, but we could also be studying Karma,” Asano rolled his eyes.  
“Nope nope, I’m going to go out there and be legendary,” Karma smiled, rushing out of the condo. 

“Tell me, are you legendary now Karma?” He didn’t bother taking his eye off of his homework, but a small smirk crept onto his face.   
“Yeah yeah okay, just pass me the math... please,” Karma grumbled, wiping some blood off of his lips and sitting down beside the strawberry blond.   
“I thought you’d never ask!” He replied sarcastically. See? Asano always won. Well, almost always.


	5. you said you loved me, with your knife pressed against my throat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lol vampires go rawr (don’t judge me too harshly shh i’m tryna get away from my accounting homework)

“Seriously Karma, this has to stop. What if you accidentally cut me?” He rolled his eyes. They were on top of the roof. The sun was bound to rise in an hour or so, but before then, they could relax.  
“It wouldn’t taste as good,” Karma shrugged, “but I’ll only stop if you make me,” his eyes flickered.  
“You’re too kinky for your own good,” Gakushu sighed and lay down on the rough surface.  
“You only live once Shū, and I plan on living my life exactly the way I want to,” he explained, playing with the knife in between his thumb and index.  
“It’s hardly been one lifetime Karma,” he didn’t bother opening his eyes, “you use that excuse every time,” he let himself pout.  
“Let me have a little fun before good times come to an end,” he stopped fidgeting with the knife.  
“Who says it’s gonna end?” Asano asked back lazily, he was tired. It was nearly 5am and they had been up the whole night as usual.  
“Robert Frost,” Karma said under his breath. He must’ve been distracted by something because his voice sounded far away.  
“But he’s dead,” Asano chuckled, hoping that Karma would laugh along and that they’d be on their way.  
“He only died a few years ago.”  
“Yeah a hundred ish years ago,” he said, remembering their encounter with him that one time.  
“Already?” Karma sighed again, lying down now too. If anyone had walked by they might assume they were walking in on a highschool romance waiting to happen, or a tragedy of some sort. Two boys on a roof at dawn. But it wasn’t anything like that.  
“We’re not going to die Karma,” the name rolled off his tongue better than his own name did. He had spent years with that same word on his lips and running around his head.  
“How do you know?” At this point the two boys knew about the same amount. They’d been around for a bit too long and had learnt many many things.  
“Just a hunch,” Asano felt that the mood was going nowhere pleasant. He would enjoy a deep conversation like this usually, but he was too tired. And now he was set on changing the mood.  
“I don’t want to die yet Shū,” well that was blunt.  
“You’re kind of overripe though Karma,” he teased.  
“Yes I know I know, and a bit pruny too,” Gakushu could hear his smile. 

“The prunniest,” he confirmed, “but even if we did die, wouldn’t you be satisfied?” Maybe that wasn’t the best way to save the mood.  
“With what I have? Probably not,” and Gakushu couldn’t help but to frown at that. Was what they had not sufficient?  
“I just want more,” Karma explained, “I want to walk in the sun again.” So that was what it was about.  
“You could watch a sunrise on your phone.”  
“It’s not the same,” he paused, “it’s not warm.”  
“Blood.”  
“The feeling’s fleeting,” Karma argued.  
“Nothing lasts anyways,” they were going back and forth.  
“So you agree with me.” Another pause as Asano realized what Karma meant- for the most part at least. He was never a sun lover himself, warmth was more of a need than a want when he could have it.  
“To an extent. Why do you miss the sun?” It was an honest question.  
“It’s one of the only ways I get to remember how I was before all of this,” Karma explained, looking into the dark sky. Asano found himself amused at what Karma was saying.  
“You weren’t all that as a human, Akabane,” and Karma raised his eyebrow.  
“Yeah, well I still had more to live for.”  
“You were pretty much exactly the same,” Asano rolled his eyes, “violent, arrogant, sly, loud,” he listed some things off.  
“But,” Karma frowned, “you liked it.” Asano paused to think.  
“Did I?” Now Karma got up.  
“You said you did.”  
“I could’ve been lying,” Asano shrugged, still not opening his eyes.  
“Is this your breakup speech?”  
“In your dreams,” Asano dismissed the thought, “so, you say,” he hummed, “that life was so much better in the sun. But don’t you remember? Our last day of highschool,” that was also the last day they were human.  
“It’s the one day I won’t forget.”  
“Good, so you remember what you did to me?” He smiled and opened an eye from his place on the roof. Dawn was near, and they’d have to leave in a second, but sometimes all you need is a second.  
“I’ve done many things to you Gakushū,” he teased, but it was obvious that he wanted the answer.  
“Yes yes, well, right after the ceremony you pulled me into an alley,” he chuckled, knowing that the same memory that was playing in his mind was playing in Karma’s as well.  
“Yes I remember, the one where the strays used to hang out,” he referred to the cats that ultimately got them turned.  
“Well if I remember correctly,” he sat up and looked Karma in the eye. Purple meeting gold in such an aggressive and intense way, “you backed me into a wall,” he smirked, “you said you loved me with your knife pressed against my throat.” Karma was smiling brightly now too, remembering the look on Asano’s face when he confessed.  
“I miss that,” his gaze on Gakushu was softened as he let himself remember every aspect of the perfect moment.  
“You could do it again,” Gakushu suggested quietly, but he knew Karma would hear.  
“What was that?”  
“You heard me Akabane,” now his tone was as strict as he was handsome (cringe lmao,) “so what there’s no sun? You, me, the moon.”

Then in that moment, Karma realized what Gakushu was saying was true. All the experiences they had under the sun, in a life so distant they could barely recall, they could do right now. Karma even kept the knife. So the redhead smiled and nodded his head.  
“You’re right.”  
“As usual,” Asano replied without missing a beat. Karma felt unusually content as Asano stood up completely. It was time for them to go to bed- and that’s when it hit him.  
“You bitch,” Karma stared at him, “you’re not allowed to talk about you and me in a dark alley right before we go to bed,” he groaned, “do you WANT me to die young? You couldn’t have waited another twelve hours? No?” Asano laughed. At least Karma was back.  
“Since you called me a bitch, you’re going to have to find another place to sleep tonight,” he chuckled as he jumped off of the roof and flew off as a small bat. Karma rolled his eyes at how dramatic his partner could be and promptly followed suit. Gakushu had to be kidding about the sleeping place right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> keep in mind that in this AU their relationship has evolved and they’re comfortable with each other because they’ve been hanging around each other for centuries. Also highschool probably wasn’t called highschool back then and there probably weren’t alleys like that but shhhhhh pretend


	6. i don’t want you to forget me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> OK THIS ONE, IM SORRY I WROTE THIS AT 2AM AND I WAS LIKE LETS WRITE ANGST 😭😭 BUT THEN IT WASNT EVEN GOOD ANGST- so anyways yeah i mean like sorry if i wrote asano with too many emotions 👉👈 i just figured he was sad??

“Asano,” his father’s voice rang through the nearly empty hallway. A pair of feet making their way to the other side of the house could be heard. “Gakushū,” the boy barely flinched. He had important things to do. Somethings were more important than his father, most things actually, but this thing- or rather this person, may as well be the most important person in the world.   
-  
So he was off, biking a good kilometre or two to the hospital. Had you told Gakushū Asano that he’d be racing to the hospital to see the insufferable redhead a good year or two ago, he’d dismiss you as crazy. But time has a weird way of making the impossible possible. Upon arriving at the hospital, he had to sign in, the same way he had been doing for the past month or so. After doing that; he made his way past countless doors painted in white and dozens of doctors and nurses. He walked up some stone steps and finally reached room 169, the private suite that held Karma Akabane. Gakushu was relieved that visiting hours were still on until 10 in the night, so he wouldn’t have to take the window entrance.   
-  
Asano did the next part of his night like it was a piece on the guitar that he had perfected. It was like muscle memory. He set his bag down on the window sill beside Karma’s bed, replaced the book Karma would have on his bed side with another ridiculously long one, then sat down. The hard part was that there seemed to be a new bar or measure added to his perfected piece. This threw him off like it would any good musician, and frustrated him to no end. Nowadays he had to wait for Karma to wake up. It only started about a week ago, but Gakushu knew it wouldn’t change any time soon. Karma used to always be awake and ready for a debate when Asano made his way through the door, but now he was limp. He was unconscious and it wasn’t even a guarantee that Gakushu would see him awake during his visiting time. Asano hated waiting, but it was all he could do. So during the wait he decided to read. He read out loud, hoping Karma would hear him and stir.   
-  
“And that’s why I don’t believe in anything beyond the universe,” Asano finished the third chapter, “Chapter Four,” he was about to begin when he heard a raspy voice coming from Karma’s bed.

“Your voice is insufferable Shū,” Asano smiles at the nickname Karma had given him. Technically speaking, they weren’t even on first name basis, but he had made exceptions for Karma before. 

“You’re up,” he stated, which made Karma laugh until he broke into a coughing fit.

“Really? I think I’m pretty down right now,” he managed to make his voice sound taunting despite his condition.

“And you call me insufferable,” Gakushu huffed, taking a seat and smiling despite himself. 

“I take it you missed me?”

“What makes you think that?” 

“Just a hunch, but you didn’t bring flowers this time so maybe the love isn’t real,” he shrugged but let one of his signature grins onto his face. 

“Those ones have to wilt first,” Asano explained, “now how are you feeling?” There was a pause before Karma mumbled. 

“Not better,” this was unlike him. He was always so confident. 

“Have you been reading?” The doctors said it was good for his brain.

“I can’t hold anything Shū,” Karma mumbled again, and this brought Gakushu back to when Karma had first been admitted. Back when the promise of a normal future was still something they thought they had. He had to make a conscious effort to keep his voice steady when he assured Karma that he would get through this. 

“I’m sure your motor skills with improve, they have to right?”

“Shū,” Karma said sternly this time, looking the younger boy in the eye, “they’re keeping me alive not curing me.”

“You don’t have to be so blunt Karma,” he was mad now. How couldnt he be? Karma was being insensitive. 

“I’m sorry, just lost all hope is all,” an awkward silence filled the room. Once it was clear to Karma that Gakushu wouldn’t- or couldn’t say anything more, he continued, “I’m not making it better but they say I’ll start forgetting things,” he explained. 

“Stop,” he couldn’t hide the crack in his usually stable and calm voice. 

“But Gakushū,” Karma started, not letting their eye contact break, “Gakushū don’t cry,” he felt bad all of a sudden. He knew Asano cared for him, and that he somehow found a way to stay optimistic about Karma’s situation, but he knew that Asano’s devastation would hit less hard if he knew the truth and had time to process. He didn’t want his death to come as a surprise to the strawberry blond boy.

“Don’t,” he took a shaky breath, “tell me what to do Karma.”

“Gakushū,” Karma sighed, “I’m, I don’t remember the things anymore,” he started off, and found himself tearing up a bit too, “the quadricep expression, quad, four, that math,” this pained Gakushu to listen to. Karma was better than him at math. He had to be. 

“The quadratic equation Karma, y-you’re not fooling anyone,” he tried his best to look unimpressed. 

“Asano, Shū, Gakushu, second place, strawberry shortcake, fuck,” he was having a hard time remembering the nicknames he had given to the boy sitting in front of him, “I’m sorry okay?” He let out a few tears, “I’m sorry. I should be able to work as a normal person, I should be able to challenge you in math and Japanese and,” Asano flinched, knowing that Karma was terrible at Japanese, but he decided to ignore it, “I should be able to talk to you and read and remember you but,” he sighed, “I’m not gonna be able to do that okay? I just need you to come to terms with this before it surprises you and you get effected by whatever’s going on with me. I don’t want to be the reason you’re sad or that your grades are bad, not like this,” he was rambling. Asano couldn’t believe this! The real Karma wouldn’t say these things. The real Karma would insult him. 

Gakushu stood up. 

“Shū come on, we knew it was going to happen,” Asano was sure that the redhead had overdosed on some meds or something. This wasn’t real. Maybe he needed air. Maybe Karma was still sleeping and he was hallucinating. Gakuho mustve snuck some drugs into his soup. That must’ve been it. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” was all Asano could say before bolting out of the room. 

When he got home he locked himself in his room, remembering what Karma had rambled on about. He remembered how sincere he looked, how dead he was, how the words he said were lies. Gakushu wasn’t having any of his bullshit. He sat at his desk that night, muttering words that upset his father to no end. The last thing Gakuho wanted was for Akabane to drag his son’s sanity down. But something in the way Gakushu mumbled through the night told his father that it was already too late. 

“I don’t want you to forget me Karma,” he would mumble, “I don’t want you to forget me, I don’t want you to forget me, I don’t want you to forget...”

But Karma eventually he did. And when he did, Gakushū’s downward spiral had begun :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol don’t kill me ik it’s bad ✌️🤡✌️if u read this far, mwah ily now and if there’s a typo i’m sorry Mr. H i tried to be a good student but l o l clown school time :,)


	7. In the red neon light you looked like death. You also looked beautiful.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Businessman Asano finds himself in a red room. His sins have finally caught up to him, and it was time to go, but not without asking his captor for a little something.

“Akabane?” He asked, his voice raspy and dry.

  
“Hey,” he couldn’t look the other man in the eyes.

  
“Where am I?” He asked, looking around the room he was tied up in. It seemed like they were underground, down in an old room, just bare illuminated by red neon lights. The situation sent shivers down Asano’s spine. The last time he was in a closed room with Karma Akabane had been just over ten years ago. Since then, their paths had crossed more than once, but had stopped meeting once Karma lost his job with the government. Asano always did wonder what happened to the ex-bureaucrat after he went under the radar. It turns out this was what he had been up to.

  
“No questions sir,” Karma’s voice was lower, more sinister even. The level of formality made Gakushū want to hurl, and yet Karma wouldn’t even face him. 

  
“Look at me when you talk to me,” Asano was no idiot. He knew why Karma was there. He knew why he was wherever he was. He was a corrupt businessman who manipulated his peers and someone sent an assassin of some sort to dispose of him. He didn’t expect for it to be the man who was fired for meddling with affairs in the government, but it didn’t matter who it was at that point. He just wanted some respect as he went out. He felt that despite his recent illegal actions, he deserved something more than an inhuman death, one that was done without emotion. If he was going to die that night, and be killed by Karma no less, he was going to die properly. (idk guys)

  
“I’d much rather not,” Karma’s voice rung in his ears. It was the only sound he could hear in the room. 

  
“Afraid you’ll see something scary?” He asked, not waiting a second to respond. Maybe he wanted Karma to look at him because he wanted to be doing something he loved while he died, or maybe because he deserved respect, or maybe it was because he didn’t think he’d be satisfied enough to die without seeing those eyes one last time. 

  
“When I saw your name on the list,” Karma sighed and looked up at the other man, his eyes clouded with something not unlike pity, grief and nostalgia, “I almost didn’t take the job.” There was a thick silence that fell between the two. 

  
“But here we are.”

  
“Not how I imagined catching up with you,” Karma admitted, looking down again.

“You need to look me in the eye when you talk to me Akabane,” Karma looked back up, slightly grateful at the use of his last name. He knew he wouldn’t know how to react if Asano had called him Karma. 

“You’re in no position to order me around mister chairman.”

“What happened to you?” Karma was taken back by this. What happened to HIM?

“I could ask you the same thing Asano,” he tilted his head, “I know the types of people who end up on this list.”

“I grew a business, that’s all.”

“I never took you as a cheater,” he kept frowning.

“I always knew you’d drop out some day,” Asano decided to disregard Karma’s rude comment, “but I didn’t think your self control was so little that you’d decide to drop out this late in life.”

“They fired me,” he didn’t miss a beat.

“I can only imagine why,” Gakushu rolled his eyes. 

“I walked in on something I shouldn’t have,” he took a step forward.

“Ah.”

“Put your hair down Ga-Asano,” Karma almost used his hand to push some of his hair out of his face- almost. 

“Only if you do,” it was a miracle that he was so calm. Karma was terrified and in awe of what a man who had accepted his fate was capable of. So he let his red locks down; with his bangs down, he looked identical to the Karma that Asano was familiar with. After this, Asano did the same. 

“You look less like your father now,” Karma remarked, taking a knife out. 

“I’m thrilled,” maybe that was why Karma hated this new persona. It was too much like Gakuho Asano for his liking. A prodigy child with a heart for strays and redheads with anger issues had no place in the corrupt field of business, and yet there he was; in the centre of it all. Karma had to banish the thoughts from his head, knowing that if he didn’t, he couldn’t get the job done. 

“Do you regret it?” He couldn’t stop himself, but it was a step up from talking about the man’s father. 

“You know better than to question my morals Akabane.”

“Do you wish you could go back,” he cursed at himself for spewing questions like these.

“To when?”

“Graduation,” it was almost as if his mind wasn’t in control of his mouth anymore. Maybe it was because he wanted answers, and because it would be a waste to kill Asano without extracting some sort of information. 

“No,” he replied, still starring right into Karma’s eyes, “I don’t need to wish,” he smiled softly and menacingly, “it feels like I’m back already,” he said, reminding Karma of 13 years ago, back when they’d be doing something entirely different had they been in an empty room together. 

“Who’s going to take over the company?” Finally a normal question. 

“Stockholders.”

“Are you ready?” At that moment, something in Karma’s eyes glowed. Asano could only remember that happening on one other occasion. The reflection of the red light on his cheeks, along with his hair and the gleam in his eye made Asano feel like Karma was the only tangible thing ever. 

“Karma,” the word slipped out of his mouth like a bird leaving the nest, or like honey dripping into hot tea. It came out of his mouth because it was something that needed to be done, both Karma and Gakushū knew this. 

“Gakushū,” his name had thrown him off, and the effect lasted longer then Karma could care to admit. But even as something ignited inside himself at the mention of his name, his hand subconsciously reached for the gun in his holster. He pressed it against Asano’s chest, where his beating heart was. The heart that had once belonged to...

“Karma,” the way he said his name sounded familiar, and different somehow, it made Karma wonder if Asano had been lying during this encounter, about not regretting anything, about graduation, about his life; he wondered this because nothing he had said tonight prior to the five letter word that was his killer’s name had sounded as sincere. 

“Shu,” Karma responded after a moment of silence while he was trying to collect his thoughts. During that time, Asano’s heart beat began to rapidly beat faster. Sure, he had accepted death in his mind, but his body had a different way of reacting. Though in a way it soothed Karma, reminding him that this was a person, a target. Not a distant memory. This target had a heartbeat, but that would soon change. Karma tensed his hand on the trigger when Asano spoke again, one last time. This time, the sound was as genuine as before, but less shaky. 

“Kiss me.”

It was a simple request, and Karma begrudgingly agreed. It was a bittersweet feeling really. The man he had spent the last two months stalking and hunting, the same one he crushed on for five years, the man who was at his and his gun’s mercy, asking for a kiss. A dying man with a dying wish. Asano knew what he was asking when he asked for it, knowing that he could be satisfied with dying that way. There was a bit more than respect to a kiss. He also knew that this could leave Karma stunned, kissing an alive human until you’re left with a corpse must be quite the experience, though Gakushū could never know for certain. 

So as Karma Akabane, in all his glory leaned down to kiss the man he had held at gun point, Gakushū Asano closed his eyes, ready for the kiss, ready for death, and ready for the last thing he saw to be the face of death, the face of Karma; a beautiful face in the red neon lights. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually liked this one lol, I realize I didn’t edit anything but yknow I have faith in myself at 3am. I said the other vampire thing would be last one Id write last night, but you know people get bored :) I hope you like it I guess


	8. i saw you in my dreams again, it felt so real

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How has Gakushū’s death affected Karma? This is a continuation of the last one shot I wrote about business man Asano.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry if the dream feels rushed, I wrote this over the course of the whole day with hour intervals because I had school. So the writing style might we weird l o l ok here goes :)

It had been two months since the last kiss Karma would ever share with Gakushū Asano. Two months since the last kiss Asano would ever give. So little had changed for the redhead that it disturbed him. He thought that life would be much more different, more difficult perhaps without the man he killed with a kiss. Only it wasn’t. He had to admit, that prior to their encounter in the red room, Asano had been less than a side character in his life, but that didn’t mean he wanted it to be that way. Karma found himself conflicted about a man he had killed, but not for the reasons you would think. He needed a drink. He called up an d classmate and colleague of his.   
“Hello?”   
“Drinks tonight, on me,” Karma told the blue haired boy, cutting to the chase.   
“Oh, alright. What’s wrong?”  
lYou’ll hear about it later,” Karma explained before hanging up. He groaned and walked over to his table, looking at the files he had left there beside his bowl of cereal. There was another businessman who had gone too far, and he was Karma’s next target. This seemed all too familiar, it made him sick. Karma decided to lay off the work that day, watching tv as he patiently waited for the night to take over and engulf the sun.   
  
Soon enough, that’s exactly what the night did, and Karma was off to the bar. Recently, he noticed that people stopped starring at him whenever he walked into the bar, and he knew that they’d stopped doing that mainly because they pitied him. He was the ex-bureaucrat who had gotten fired from god knows that. The locals deemed it acceptable for him to get wasted every once in a while- with his, small chested, blue haired female companion?   
  
“Karma!” Nagisa waved, he knew to be there early, because it seemed like it was going to be one of those nights. One of the nights when Karma had regrets or something like that, because he hadn’t taken the time to explain on the phone, Nagisa figured it must be that bad.   
“Yeah hey,” Karma smiled, though it took more effort than he liked.   
“So, hows the job?” Nagisa asked as they walked into the bar that they had become regular at.  
“That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.” This was going to be

a long night, but a drink might help speed things up. They began drinking, and for once Nagisa wasn’t the only one wasted.

“Wait so,” the blue haired boy tried to clarify, “you saw the president!” He laughed, “and you kill- oh kissed him?” 

“No not the president, you know that snobbish school kid?” Nagisa was confused, had Karma kissed a minor?

“I didn’t know you liked jail,” Nagisa sung, too drunk for his own good. Since he was a lightweight, he had gone out in two drinks. Karma had to get through six before he would go into hysteria.

“Nooooooo, Nagisa he’s only five,” he grumbled, referring to the amount of days Asano was younger than him by.

“FIVE!” Nagisa jumped on the redhead’s back.

“DAYS!” Karma yelled. Everyone else in the bar was just about as drunk and maybe a bit louder, so it was fine. 

“HE WAS A NEWBORN!!!” Nagisa felt like throwing up.

“YEAH THIRTY YEARS AGO,” Karma downed his seventh cup.

“ME TOO! Hey, so Karma,” Nagisa batted his eyes before leaning his forehead against the counter, slurring his words. 

“Yes?” At least _he_ could still speak normally.

“What ever happened between you and that carrot guy?” He asked, fiddling around with his empty glass. 

“Huh?” A carrot guy, what?

“The principle’s son,” whatever triggered his memories of Karma taunting Asano about fifteen years ago was beyond him, but it was enough to make Karma want to vomit. Only he didn’t want to vomit for the reasons a drunk man would, he wanted to vomit because Nagisa’s words were terrifyingly sobering. The principle’s son: Gakushū Asano.

“He’s,” he paused, “he’s who I was talking about,” Karma mumbled. 

“HE’S DEAD?” If the words weren’t heavy enough in the air, they were more than too heavy in Karma’s heart. 

“I guess so, yeah,” he mumbled again. He supposed that it was a bit unlike him to be so timid, so maybe he wasn’t all that sober.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Nagisa murmured before snuggling up on the counter. Karma decided that it was time to go home- they had already spent a good three hours bouncing their problems off of each other. 

“I’ll carry you home then,” Karma sighed, standing up to stretch then to pick the shorter man up.

“Gently!” Nagisa laughed. 

So after a long walk to Nagisa’s home, carrying the blue haired man on his back, Karma found himself at the steps of his home. The all too familiar building that was now solely his loomed over him and he sighed. He entered, kicked his shoes off, and went to sit on the couch. 

_“For someone as disorderly as you, your house is in excellent shape,” Asano commented; it was the first time he had stepped foot inside the Akabane household, but certainly not the last._

_“Was that a compliment second place?” Karma mused, a small smile on his pink lips._

_“Don’t take it personally.”_

_“I can’t promise you anything.” He went to get some snacks for the two of them. They had a project to work on and were fortunate enough to be each other’s assigned partners._

_“I could do this work by myself,” Asano offered as he took the strawberry milk Karma had given him with a nod._

_“Where’s the fun in that?” He smiled, sitting down on the couch in front of the tv and behind a coffee table. Asano followed behind him._

_“Work isn’t about the fun Akabane,” he shook his head, setting some papers down on the coffee table, “the sooner you learn that, the sooner we can get on with the assignment.”_

_“At least you said we,” Karma shrugged, taking a sip of the pink beverage._

_“I said non,” he joked, dividing the papers equally for them._

_“Asano? A sense of humour?” Karma gasped, “what did you do to mister class president?” He exaggerated his shock, and though he would never admit it, Gakushū was amused._

_“I killed him,” he was saying all of this with a straight face and a stern voice. Karma could’ve laughed, but he had a role to play._

_“Oh, but I was rather fond of him,” he pouted, simultaneously looking at the papers placed in front of him._

_“I’m sure he wouldn’t say the same, but since he’s not around,” he looked solemn, “I’ll tell you myself,” he smiled slightly._

_“It’s a shame you had to replace him,” Karma said, looking awfully sad._

_“Yes, very unfortunate. He was the better side of me,” Asano nodded, also taking the papers in his hands._

_“So handsome,” Karma said thoughtfully. This almost made Gakushū choke on his spit, almost._

_“Yes, I,” he cleared his throat? “I suppose he was.” An awkwardly satisfying silence cane between the two._

Karma found himself starring at the couch for just over ten minutes, trying to piece together the memory that now only he alone had. It was funny really, how memories were shared until... well until there was no one to share them with. He had to snap out of his thoughts, so he went to shower. 

Surely the bathroom wouldn’t provide him with any more memories of Asano.

He was wrong. So very wrong. He got into the shower and stared at his sink for another five minutes, recalling the time when-

_“I should really head home Akabane,” Gakushū was standing awkwardly in the large master bathroom._

_“It’s too late for that, this is the bathroom, go wash up. I’ll be out there if you need me,” Karma was about to head out when he noticed how tense Asano had gotten, “you need me?”_

_“Don’t be ridiculous Akabane,” his eyes were fixated at something under the sink. Karma felt himself freeze as well. He kept a lot of things under that sink. Had Asano spotted his gun?_

_“See something you like?” He asked, hoping that his voice sounded calm enough to pass off as nonchalant._

_“Uh,” he snapped out of his trance, “is someone else staying here?” He sounded unusually timid._

_“What?” That caught Karma off guard, why would Asano think that somebody else was living with him._

_“I don’t want to barge in on anything,” Asano looked up at Karma._

_“What exactly did you see?” Karma shook his head and walked forward, pushing Asano to the side a bit._

_“Nothing!” Asano’s reaction would’ve been hilarious to Akabane, but he was worried about what Gakushū might’ve seen. It took him a moment to see, but when he did, he wished he had arranged his washroom better._

_“Oh,” he managed to say after a second, “um,” his face was almost as red as his hair._

_“I really don’t need to know Akabane, I’ll just forget I saw anything.”_

_“Wait,” Karma turned to face Asano, who was also a bright shade of red, “it’s not what it looks like,” he said a bit too quickly._

_“I don’t need to know Akabane,” he raised his hands in surrender, “I won’t judge you. It’s normal really.”_

_“That’s not my bra,” Karma got the wrong idea of what the misunderstanding was._

_“Oh I know,” Asano smiled weakly, “I never assumed it was,” he stepped back._

_“OH,” Karma leaned back on the counter, sighing in relief, “you thought I had a girlfriend,” he laughed, “oh my god, you should’ve seen the look on your face!” Asano was confused, but retorted angrily._

_“Yours isn’t any better!”_

_“If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were disappointed by my ‘girlfriend,’ or rather by me having one?” He smiled, taunting Asano._

_“If you don’t have a girlfriend, why do you have lingerie?”_

_“It’s for Nagisa,” he explained like Asano would understand after his brief explanation._

_“What?” Was Nagisa transgender? We’re they dating? He didn’t sign up for this much of Karma’s personal life._

_“It’s a Christmas present for him,” Karma shrugged, “he hates it when I get him dresses, so,” he picked the bra up from the small basket beside the sink._

_“So you got him this?” Asano was even more confused, but also relieved in some odd way._

_“Yes, but he doesn’t know that,” Karma explained, “we have secret santa,” he explained; we meaning his 3-E class._

_“Ah,” now the air in the room was less tense, but more awkward somehow. That was, until Karma finally stepped aside, putting the lingerie back, then heading out the door._

Karma decided he didn’t need a shower, he needed sleep. He turned off the running water that had been hitting him while he remembered the look on Gakushū’s face when he saw the bra. Then he put some shorts on, not bothering to dry himself with a towel before going straight to bed. He would deal with the mess in the morning. He was starting to feel the hangover, the pounding in his head and the ringing in his ears. It was soothing actually, compared to his flashbacks of Gakushū. He let the throbbing pain subside as he was lulled to sleep. 

Then as if the world of the living and the dead, along with the world of sleep were against him, he dreamt of Gakushū. 

He was inside the red room, wearing the same clothes he was wearing when he killed. 

“Karma,” an all too familiar voice called, only Karma could see no one else in the room, “Karma,” it repeated. 

“Gakushu?” He asked, looking around frantically. Where was the voice coming from?

“Karma,” he called again.

“Where are you?” He asked, and then the walls were gone. He was outside. The sky was blue, there were no neon lights. The road was made of asphalt and cherry blossoms were in full bloom. 

“I’m not sure,” the voice replied from behind him, making him turn around. Then finally he was facing Asano, the voice in the room and now in the streets, the same once that bounced around in his head to no end. 

“I’m sorry,” Karma found himself saying, looking up into the violet eyes. 

“Don’t be.”

“Don’t tell me what to do,” he forced a smile.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” he sighed.

“I’m sorry that I did this to you,” Karma said, and he meant it, “but thank you- I cherish our time together. I just wish I could’ve told you.”

“Karma,” he shook his head and began to walk the other way, “as strange as it may sound,” he stopped walking for a second, so Karma could see his figure before it left to enter some strange light at the other end of the road, “I should be the one thanking you.” The way he said that made Karma know he was smiling. 

“You’re happy then? Now?” Karma wasn’t sure if that sentence even made sense.

“That’s debatable,” he began walking slowly again before turning around a final time, “but I lied. You know,” his violet eyes pierced into Karma’s golden ones, “I do regret it,” his smile didn’t falter, “but I’m glad you were the one to snap me out of it.”

There was a brief silence, and Karma held his breath, trying to hold back tears he didn’t know were forming.

“I have to go,” Asano said, finally.

“Where will you go?” He managers to choked out.

“Somewhere nice,” he said, and the light seemed to engulf him even more, “goodbye Karma.”

Then he was gone, and Karma was awake.

That morning, his head ached and his mind raced, along with his heart. He brushed his teeth, cleaned up, and got dressed, and ran out of his house like a mad man. Everyone that saw him must’ve thought he had finally lost it. He ran all the way to the old Asano home, the one that was 30 minutes from his own house. Once he got there, he jumped the fence to get into the backyard, where he had a feeling Gakushū was buried. He was right. He looked at the stone and sighed, not knowing why he was there. Why _was_ he there? He was the one who put Asano 6 feet under, and he was the reason why his company was being run by lesser shareholders... but maybe that didn’t matter. Asano seemed so ready for death

Then, he thought that maybe the reason he was there was tied to the dream he had. He felt like their conversation wasn’t over yet. He traced his fingers on the engraved words and decided he’d have to start doing this more often. It was the best way to get closure

So that morning was the first of countless, that the ex-bureaucrat would spend hanging around the grave stone of the man he had killed. If you listened closely, you could probably hear him talking, saying things to the headstone as though it were listening. The first thing he said that day was this, “I saw you in my dreams again, it felt so real.”


	9. you’re not scared of love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gakushū is asexual and is scared of losing Karma like he lost his past girlfriend. Mentions of sex and consent. If this triggers you please don’t read it.

“I think I deserve a little more than this,” the feminine voice rung in Gakushū’s head as he sat hiding in a supply closet, “why are you so scared? You’d be taking control anyways,” she scolded him.   
  
During the time that that conversation had taken place, Asano found himself in a distasteful relationship with a girl from the all girl’s school across the street. To say she was demanding was an understatement- though Asano could afford most of her monetary demands- but there were some things he couldn’t do. That’s how they got into the situation, and Asano could still recall all the details from that day, even now: 3 years later. 

  
“Gakushū,” she purred, in a way that only she could pull off. He tensed at this, not exactly enjoying his current predicament. They were alone in his bedroom and had just wrapped up their tutoring session; while others assumed more was going on during the hour and a half, nothing ever did. She wanted to change that.   
“Yes?” He asked, keeping his composure, he knew where this was going, but didn’t feel the need to let his guard down; if this went well he could simply decline.   
“It’s our four month anniversary,” she continued, moving away from his desk to sit on the bed. “You mentioned your room being sound proof?”   
“Yes, guitar practice,” he nodded, even though they had a soundproof recording room in the basement, he always found it easier to just stay in his room.   
“Right,” she smirked, “guitar.” He felt a chill creeping up his spine.   
“It’s getting dark, do you need me to walk you home?” That was his way of telling her to leave, but her smirk didn’t falter.   
“I was thinking we could put your sound proof walls to the test,” she hummed, looking around the room, then back at Asano.  
“How so?”   
“I have a few ideas,” she said nonchalantly, looking him up and down.   
“We have school tomorrow,” he explained, avoiding her gaze.  
“We won’t take too long,” her smirk faded just a bit, why was he so stubborn?  
“Yua,” he started off after sighing, and his partner had heard that tone before.   
“We’ve been

dating for four months now, do I not look nice?” She asked, looking disappointed. Asano groaned, he did like her, she was smart, snarky, and very pretty but... that was about it. A lot of the times he used her for appearances, and in return she would get showered with gifts and brought out. It was their ordeal, and Gakushū didn’t want it to go any further.

“No, you look stunning,” he explained, taking a seat beside her, “but, it’s getting late.”

“Your dad’s not even home,” she pointed out.

“Does that matter?” 

“Don’t you want to sleep with your girlfriend?” She blurted out. Now that it was out in the open, Gakushū shifted uncomfortably, “oh my god, you don’t!” She laughed, but it wasn’t funny. 

“Not really,” he said in a voice too quiet for him.

“What’s wrong with you?”

“A whole lot apparently,” he muttered, looking down, this was a topic he didn’t like discussing. It wasn’t that she wasn’t appealing, or that Gakushū had never had sexual thoughts, it just felt wrong then. It had only been four months- but to her it was more like it’s already been four months.’ 

“I just don’t get it. Is it me?” Their conversation started off in a way that got Gakushū’s hopes up for a compromise. 

“No, it’s not,” he looked up at her, “look I’m sorry,” a rare apology from Gakushū Asano.

“If you’re sorry, prove it.” He took a deep breath.

“I’m not sure that I can. Could you trust me, just this once?” He asked with a steady and hopeful voice. 

“Just this once?” She scoffed, crossing her legs, “this is hardly the first time. Have you not noticed my advances?” A part of Gakushū found the root of her anger stupid, but another louder part of him thought she was right. Everyone else did it, so why did he not want to? Maybe it was because of his upbringing, he always blamed his differences on how his father had raised him. 

“I have,” he paused, “taken them into account.”

“How old are you Gakushū?” She sounded more ticked off with every new word uttered. 

“Seventeen,” he said as loud as he could. 

“Then why are we having a middle school relationship?” She asked, getting up. 

“It’s not entirely a middle school relationship,” he bit his tongue. Sure he could debate with a professional four times his age on any topic from computer science to ethics, but he couldn’t debate something like this. 

“Oh? Which part of it isn’t like a middle school?” 

“You stay at my house,” he offered and she scoffed. 

“Seriously? Seriously Gakushū?!” She groaned.

“I’m sorry, really. Maybe next time,” he hoped that she would drop it every other time.

“I think I deserve a little more than this, why are you so scared? You’d be taking control anyways.”

“I’m, just,” he hated that she had a point, “I don’t think I’m ready,” he said as steadily as he could. 

“I don’t think you’re ready for this relationship either then.” Then in the next few minutes she was gone. She wouldn’t come back either, not to be his friend, not to be anything more. 

He was alone. 

Was there something really wrong with him?

That was why he was in the closet, he was scared. Scared that the same thing would go down. He was in hiding, hiding from a second rejection. 

To be more specific, he was hiding from Karma Akabane. He had met Karma in a café when they were 19. One day, they had to sit at the same table, due to the crowdedness of the place, and Karma was very straight forward. 

“Let me pay for your drink,” he said, knowing full well that Gakushū had paid for the drink at the counter. 

“Excuse me?” He asked, eyeing the redhead in a way that should’ve stopped any more advances. 

“Alright fine, I admit these aren’t the best circumstances for the first date,” he winked, “so I’ll make up for it next time, alright stranger?” He he said as he slipped a napkin with his number on it to Asano. Karma had been meaning to ask him out for about a week at that point, since they had been eating at the same café for about a month. 

“Karma right?” He remembered the name the baristas would call when the redhead went to get his drink.

“You can call me Karma, or call me later,” he laughed before apologizing, “sorry I’m not at the top of my gayme.”

“I’m glad,” Asano said as he took the napkin and dipped his drink. “If this were you at your top, I’d have to decline. Politely of course.”

“Frankly, I’m not sure if you could handle my top. The one I have on would be a bit big on you,” he smirked, taking a sip of his drink. 

Then for the one of the first times in his life, Asano was speechless. Perhaps this ‘second’ date would be worth his time. It might also make him forget about.. yeah, that, and he could prove to her that he wasn’t in fact ‘scared of love.’

The events that took place before Gakushū his from Karma went similarly to the situation he was in with his previous girlfriend. They were in his room, talking about business studies and a dash of computer sciences when Karma initiated an unexpected kiss. Asano actually enjoyed it, until Karma grabbed his waist and pulled apart. He frowned at the loss of touch, but more so at the question Karma asked afterwards. 

“You okay with this?” They had been together for a year and the subject hardly ever came up, the only times it had were during their playful flirting or arguments. It was never addressed seriously like this. 

“I don’t think I’m,” he choked out, jerking out from under Karma, panic rising in his throat. 

He loved Karma. He was sure he did, more sure than he was with his exam answers, and Gakushū always double checked. He knew he loved Karma, so why was this so difficult? He blamed himself for whatever would happen, knowing that Karma probably wanted to be with someone he could get physical with without having to ask a million times. A part of him knew he loved Karma enough to let him be with someone else who could satisfy him, so he ran out of his condo, leaving the sentence in the air; also leaving Karma with a confused look on his face. 

He ran. Where? Well, to the first open room, which happened to be a storage closet. He didn’t mind, small spaces were nice, cozy too. He shut the door and hoped Karma would just leave. He didn’t need to get scolded again, he probably couldn’t take another rejection. Not from anyone, but especially not from Karma. So when footsteps approached his hiding spot, he said a quick prayer, asking for a quick and painless death.

But when the door opened and it wasn’t a reaper, he sighed and looked at the mop beside him like it was the most interesting thing in the world. 

“Hey Shū?” Karma asked awkwardly. 

“He’s busy, leave a message,” Asano mumbled, which let Karma loosen up just a bit. 

“I’m sorry.” Well that was unexpected. Gakushū looked up.

“What? You’re sorry?”

“Yeah, I’m probably moving too fast,” he chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck, “I probably should’ve asked before kissing you too.” 

“But she said,” he mumbled, not being able to accept this kindness. Was he dreaming?

“Huh? Who?” Karma motioned for him to scoot to the side so he could join him in the small closet.

“My ex,” Gakushū frowned then sighed. 

“What about them?”

“She,” he paused, “the same, or a similar thing happened and I said I didn’t want to and she,” he looked down at his fingers, “told me I wasn’t ready for a relationship, that I was scared of love,” he finished. Karma looked hurt, but he wasn’t hurt for himself. 

“Can I hug you?” He asked, no sarcasm or anything, “I’m sorry you had to go through that,” he said after Gakushū nodded and finally faced him.

“She was right,” he laughed bitterly, “I’m scared. It’s so stupid,” he shook his head.

“No,” Karma sounded more serious than usual, “no Shū,” he stared into the violet eyes in front of him, “you’re not scared of love.”

“I won’t let you touch me Karma, what do you call that?”

“Personal preference,” the redhead explained, his amber eyes looking thoughtful and kind, “you’re not scared of love Gakushū. You put a blanket over me when I fall asleep on your couch, you get me flowers on our anniversary, you geek over maths with me,” he listed a few things and Gakushū looked confused, “you can argue that those things are also personal preference, but I think,” he smiled.

“Hm?”

“I think you love me too,” he made sure to add the ‘too,’ to make sure it didn’t sound arrogant. 

“What do you mean?” He sounded a bit more hopeful than before. 

“I’m saying that it’s the little things, the hugs, notes, dates. I think that’s love,” he said, “sex and touching and stuff is just a topping, and sometimes people don’t want toppings, that’s their decision and their decision alone to make. So you’re not scared of love, just something that people associate with it, you know?” He had to admit that he could’ve phrased that better, but by the look on Asano’s face, he knew he got his point across. 

Gakushū was smiling, and before he could finish the question, “Can I kiss-“

Karma nodded his head. 

So they kissed in the supply closet before walking back to his condo, and that was all for that night, but it was certainly more than enough. Karma was convinced that anything with Gakushū was enough, as long as there was love; and Gakushū on the other hand, was sure of three things that night: that he in fact wasn’t afraid of love, he was perfectly normal, and that he was excited for a future with Karma the man that he loved, in his own (slightly) different way. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I did this alright. Everyone’s valid and ily all, love isnt just one thing, remember that :) also i should’ve reread this but yolo. if u found me on instagram, these one shots are just copy pasted from there lmao except for when i make a mistake or change the plot but that rarely happens.


	10. do you think about me still

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How much can six years change? Everything? Or nothing at all?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some fluff for y’all because shu deserves it

It had been six years since Gakushu had last been in Japan, the country in which he was born and raised, the same country where he met the obnoxious, now government employed Karma Akabane.   
  
He knew Tokyo was rather big, and in addition to that, he knew the city like the back of his hand, (he had been born there and had walked nearly all the streets in the city from when he could walk to the the age of 18.) and yet he was still scared of an encounter with the same redhead that almost stopped him from moving away.   
  
He wished that now, 6 years later, he could say he stopped getting second thoughts about what Karma had told him whenever he thought back to that night, but he could be lying.   
  
It happened years ago, while the pair were 18, in something not unlike love, and on top of a roof.   
“Asano,” Karma said, staring up at the sky from his place on the high school’s roof where he had asked Gakushū to meet him.   
“Akabane,” the strawberry blond nodded, sitting down next to him.  
“Congratulations on your final exam,” he said, still looking up at the stars and the shattered moon.  
“Likewise,” they had both gotten perfect scores.   
The first few minutes of their meeting went like that, quietly, and a bit awkward. The aura wasn’t what it could’ve been, but with their circumstances, anything other than awkward would’ve been weird. In the next few months, a meeting like this wouldn’t be possible and they both knew it. So they sat in silence, enjoying each other’s presence, until Karma spoke. Karma was always the braver one, he always spoke first, always threw the first punch, initiated the first kiss.   
“You’re leaving,” he pointed out, with not nearly as much emotion in his voice as there should’ve been.  
“In three months, yes.” He nodded.  
“Do you not like it here Shū?” He asked suddenly, turning towards the shorter boy.   
“I love it here,” he breathed, “but I can’t go back now,” he said, not meeting Karma’s eyes. He was afraid he’d see something there that would bound him to Japan almost as much as Karma’s future as a bureaucrat tied him to the island.   
“I know,” there was a tone of defeat in his voice, but he managed to put on a smile, “I shouldn’t have called you here

,” he laughed bitterly.

“I enjoy spending time with the roof,” Gakushū said, trying to sound as kind and composed as possible, “and with you.”

“Enjoy it while you can I guess,” Karma shrugged, turning away again.

“I’m sorry Karma.”

Silence. 

“It’s a high school fling Shū, don’t worry about it,” he lied, though he was rather convincing, at least he thought so. Maybe he could make himself believe that. 

“Right,” Gakushū laid down on the roof, “fling...” he sighed, “if I ever come back to Japan and I find you’re in charge somehow,” he tried to lighten the mood and Karma smiled.

“I’m hardly that ambitious Gakushū, I’m a simple man.” He laid down too.

“I don’t think I could love a simple man,” Gakushū mumbled.

“You’d make an exception for your high school sweetheart, I’m sure.” So that was what they were gonna call it. A high school fling, a childhood romance. 

“I’ll send you a post card.”

That sentence, riddled with regret and an emotion you can’t quite name was followed by at least an hour of silence. Silence was becoming more of a thing with them nowadays, unlike the early days of their budding romance; when any form of silence from the other meant it was the perfect opportunity to slip in a snarky remark or something to get on the other’s nerves, they basked in the silence. Maybe it was because sometimes silence made it feel like the world was still, and if the world was still, so was time. 

It brought them back to a point in their lives when time was all they had, well time and each other. 

“Run away with me?” Karma uttered, and it was just a bit louder than a whisper, but it was enough to make Gakushū rethink his entire life. 

For a moment he could see it, a life in the countryside with Karma. They’d be those two city kids who knew nothing about crops other than what they’d learnt in books. They’d spend days designing their house, they’d tend to their fields before hiring some others to do the work while they managed a small business. It seemed perfect. 

The only problem was, it wasn’t them. 

As much as Gakushū would love to fast forward to a time when they’d set all their ambitions aside to pursue this high school fling, that just wasn’t who they were at the time. 

A move that big would require more than a few months time to think about, and even then, they were young. A stunt like that wouldn’t look good on transcripts. It would tie them to that life forever. As Asano contemplated the question, Karma somehow got his gaze. They stared at each other. Golden amber eyes meeting a darker violet. 

Then somewhere in the stare Karma gave him, he had his answer. 

Somehow, Gakushu was sure that running away was never even an option. They simply weren’t ready for a happy ending. The whole nature of their relationship had been built on ambition and risks; well calculated ones. So maybe the ending they needed would be based on this too, at least until the world found it was time for them to meet again. 

So that night, they took the greatest risk you could ever take in a relationship: they ended it. Risked leaving everything they once had on that roof. The roof that neither of them would sit on in a long time. 

“That’s not an option Karma,” was what he finally said.

“I know, but we could make it work,” there was the slightest bit of hesitation in his voice that just proved to Gakushū that he had been right. 

“You can’t have your dream job if we run away, and I can’t have mine. We’re too young to give that up.” Deep down, Karma agreed. He knew it was selfish to ask, but he figured it was worth a try. 

“I know,” a pause, “just,” he took a shaky breath, “if ever,” he started, “you think that for some reason we are ready,” he put emphasis on the last word, “ready, for some sort of an ending, or a continuation,” he didn’t know where he was going with this, but after seeing the concern on Asano’s face, he loosened up.

“Hm?”

“You’ll find my number in the legal worker’s book,” he put a smile on, though it didn’t have the same sting as his signature smirk, “page 37. Akabane should be at the top left.”

“Very well,” Gakushū said after smiling a bit himself, “I’ll, wait.” He thought for another moment, “until we achieve our goals. We owe it to each other, and to the farm people we’d buy the land from.” Karma raised an eyebrow at the last part of the sentence, “never mind, we owe it to this relationship to be as ambitious as possible. And more than that,” he sighed. He didn’t know where he was going with any of this, but Karma seemed to be holding on to every word, “you owe it to yourself to follow your dreams. So maybe when you’re satisfied, you can search my name up and find my website?” He was trying for a joke like Karma’s, “then call my assistant, and when we’re both ready we’ll know it.”

There was so much more to say, but no way to say most of it.

“I’m sure I’ll call you first,” Karma finally said, “but another thing,” he sighed, “keep me in the back of your mind. While your dealing with Johns and Smiths and Karens and whatever names they have in America, if they give you a hard time, remember that I could probably take them.” Maybe it was the time that was making them mush like this, or maybe it was because their decision hadn’t been an easy one. 

“They say there’s always a special place in your heart for your first lover,” Asano said, looking at Karma in the moonlight, “I’ll keep you there, and in my phone, and contact list.” Karma chuckled. 

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“Enough to let go?”

“Enough to let go,” Asano nodded. 

They kissed that night, but that was the end of it. The end of an era really. The Akabane-Asano rivalry had expired. All that was left were two hurting boys on a quiet roof. 

Gakushū had made sure to move his flight up just in case he had second thoughts, and he’d been in the States since then. 

~~Sometimes Gakushū thought he had dreamt it all up, but the name on page 37 said otherwise.~~

Then six years later, he finally felt ready. It wasn’t a massive amount of time, but with his efficiency and countless hours spent on thinking about Karma, he decided that there was no better time than the present. He just hoped that Akabane was alright with a house call.

He thought of things to say, things to ask, small talk to start off with; all the usual things he would use on clients. But what he really wanted to ask was simple, it was if he kept his side of the promise. What he really wanted to ask was “do you still think about me?”

As he drove down the all too familiar road, he thought about that night on the roof. He remembered the words almost exactly and wondered how Karma even accepted his answer. What if the risk they took was the wrong one? Maybe Karma was right, maybe they could’ve worked it out and that the small hint of hesitation Gakushū swore to have seen was just a mistake. What if he threw it away for nothing? 

As he parked his car he looked around, walking down the sidewalk that was once his route home from school. It was amazing how the place didn’t change but the people sure did; there were young children running around, junior high students, and people who had been in much different situations when he had left the country. 

As Asano counted down the houses to Karma’s he began to grow extremely nervous. They had lost most contact a good three years ago. What if he had let go of their promises entirely? What if Gakushu really was reduced to a childhood partner. What scared him the most is that if that were true, it would’ve been his fault. He was the one who pushed Karma away. All for America. 

When he got to Karma’s house he knocked, but there was no answer. So he sighed and decided to wait some more. What was another few hours compared to the six years he’d spent thinking about Karma under the moonlight? He sat on the same steps Karma had tripped him on countless times. 

He was there for a good thirty minutes when a car rolled up into the driveway. The driver had bright red hair, and a suit on. He got out and didn’t notice Gakushu. Then he went to open the back seat and took- a baby out? Gakushu suddenly felt a lot more panicked. How old was Karma again? He had a kid? Oh, Gakushu was definitely too late. He was halfway down the steps when Karma noticed him.

“Stairs, stairs, stop right there,” he shouted, the child on his hip. Asano turned around and waved awkwardly. Karma nearly dropped the kid. “Ga- sano?” Ah, Asano had almost forgotten about calling people by their last names. 

“Sorry for intruding,” he felt his face flush as he said the words, “you seem busy, I was in town.”

“City,” Karma said as he set the kid down into the car again.

“Pardon?”

“Tokyo’s been a city for decades. Geography Asano,” the bureaucrat said as he fished his phone out of his pocket. 

“Ah, well, I should.”

“Hiroto?” Karma was suddenly talking into his phone, and Gakushū wanted to make a run for it, “yeah I can’t babysit today,” Gakushū felt a weight come off of his shoulders.

“What do you mean? I told you, I have a date today,” Maehara’s voice could faintly be heard.

“You’re not even the one who’s supposed to be babysitting, that’s Isogai. Where’s he?” Karma asked impatiently, smiling down at the kid.

“He’s my date. Give her to Nagisa,” he suggested.

“This is Nagisa’s kid.”

“Fuck, give her to Rio.”

“I’m on a tight schedule Maehara. I might take your rights away if you don’t cooperate,” Asano knew that wasn’t how it worked. 

“Fine, I’ll give her to Rio.”

“Tell her to answer my email on the newest bill,” Karma added, “you better be here in five minutes.”

“I started walking when you called.” 

Gakushū was almost out of his sight range. 

“Asano,” he called out, and the strawberry blond turned around.

“This was stupid,” he admitted. 

“Not as stupid as me calling your old phone number.” 

There was a comfortable silence. 

“So you’re ready?”

“I will be when Maehara comes,” he explained, trying his best not to make things awkward. 

So when the orange haired boy did come and take the little girl with him to his date with Isogai, Karma lead Gakushu into his house. 

During his stay, they went back to first name basis, talked about the newest developments in Japan, how Gakushu’s business was opening a base in the country, they talked about their hair styles, to their new jobs and just about everything in between. At the end of the stay, when Karma walked Gakushu to his car, Gakushu realized two things:

a) that they were right to have taken the risk. the fresh start was just that: refreshing.

and 

b) that the answer to his question over the last 6 years had in fact been ‘yes.’ Karma Akabane still did think about him, almost as much as he thought of the night on the roof. 

Maybe they’d go there for their first date, but then again, Asano wasn’t the one to pick. Since Karma was always the first, which meant he picked the first location for a date, not that Gakushu minded much though, since he had a one up on him in that domain, after all he _had_ been the first one to call (successfully.)


	11. I’m not for everyone.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gakushu Asano isnt for everyone; luckily though, the prince’s name was Karma not ‘everyone.’

“Last I checked your highness, my name was Karma. Not everyone.”  
“Clever, but I’m not for Karma either,” Gakushū smirked. It had been ten years since he had (officially) seen Karma Akabane, the prince of Hyria. Their parents didn’t need to know about their rendezvous in the woods, all they needed to see was them getting along.   
“That’s not what you were saying last time,” Karma grinned, “oh, my bad,” he exaggerated his expressions, “it’s been too long. I couldn’t possible remember what you said to me last.” Gakushu shook his head. The weight of their past conversation was almost heavier than the crowns on their heads, but somehow, talking about it jokingly in a ballroom made Gakushu forget.   
“Likewise Karma. I do hope we can catch up.”  
“We have all the time in the world,” he took a sip of the alcohol he had been offered, “unless we go to war again.”  
  
The ten years they had spent apart were thanks to a misunderstanding that lead to about three million casualties from both sides combined.   
  
“Don’t say that,” Gakushu said, taking a sip of his own concoction- well it was Karma’s, but nobody needed to know that.   
“The drink goes with your eyes,” Karma mumbled, setting the glass down on the table between their thrones. It was meant to be symbolic, the chairs side by side to the right of their parents’, but Gakushu didn’t appreciate the attention that was on them. He was used to talking to Karma in private after all. “If you’re thinking of ditching,” Karma started again after looking at Gakushū’s distracted look, “I’m all for it.” Of course he was, this was Karma.   
  
Outside of family reunions, ballrooms and gatherings, Karma Akabane was no prince. The only thing keeping his head on his body was the crown that sat on top of it. He was a troublemaker, went around beating people up, questioning slightly lower authorities, drinking- and all that; so if he left the ball with Gakushu no one would bat an eye.   
  
Gakushu on the other hand was the image of perfection. He had been trained to act as a humble and loyal robot from birth. He gave to the poor, went on walks in the forrest, read to the elderly, and all the things that Karma swears he could do- if he so desired.

If he left with Karma Akabane, a boy who used to be his kingdom’s enemy, people would do more than bat an eye. Though they might bring a bat to hunt for Karma. 

-

So the only logical thing Gakushu Asano picked to do in hat situation was nod his head and stand up. 

“Do you have an excuse in mind your highness?” He asked Karma as they both made their way up the platform. 

“I’ll think of something when they ask.”

“Somehow I find it hard to trust in your thinking skills,” Gakushu said as they reached their parents. 

-

“Yes Gakushu?” His father asked, his voice stern but soft in a way he would only use while in public. 

“Do you think it would be alright for me to leave? Take a breath of fresh air,” he explained, and his mother nodded.

“Yes of course,” she said, “come back before sunrise.” It was a generous 

curfew. 

“Are you going to ask to do the same?” Karma’s dad asked, and Karma smirked, putting his hands in his pants pocket.

“If I asked would you say yes?”

“Come back at the same time then,” his father sighed, and Karma nodded; it was his own way to bow.

“Thank you mother, father,” Gakushu bowed. Then they were off. All eyes on them as they walked down the centre of the ballroom. Everyone made way for them, so it was something like an aisle. Gakushu smiled at the people and Karma’s face looked indifferent. Once they were out, it seemed that everyone held their breaths, looking out the windows as they disappeared into the garden. 

They walked in silence for a moment, then Karma began to laugh. 

“Is that how you’re always going to be? During balls?” He looked at the other boy, who had a small smile on his face when he shrugged. 

“Some of us have appearances to keep up,” then his smile turned into something else. 

“I’m flattered that you trust me enough to let me see,” he paused to think, “this side of you.”

“As you should be. I meant what I said last night Karma,” he stopped walking to look at the redhead, “we can’t take this lightly.”

“And the other stuff?” He was referring to the other things he had said the other night, things that were more important to Karma than the mission. 

“I meant it all,” he smiled a bit, but the stern look in his eyes didn’t falter.

“I’m glad,” Karma hummed, “but there’s no way we’re meeting your curfew.”

“Our curfew,” Gakushu corrected. 

“Fine, but it’s one I don’t need to meet. Just saying,” he said as they approached the horizon.

“I’ve done it before, made it on time I mean, so if I do come home late they’ll turn a blind eye.”

“They’ll be saying things tomorrow morning,” Karma added after acknowledging Gakushu’s reassuring words.

“About how much of a bad influence you already are? I’m sure of it. To think, it’s the first day of peace,” the two of them had stopped walking to stare at the where the sun met the sea. 

“Well there’s never peace where we’re going.” They smiled, taking their fancy ballroom clothes off, leaving them in white tank tops and dress pants. “You ready?”

“You’re asking me like it was my first time,” Gakushu rolled his eyes, “just don’t scream this time.”

“No promises Asano,” Karma laughed again, taking his shirt off, “don’t pretend you don’t like it.”

“The way you’re talking will arouse suspicion.”

“It’ll arouse more than that.”

”We should hide the clothes this time,” he explained, but something in the way that Karma jumped off the cliff with a grin on his face told Gakushu that they weren’t going to do that. He followed with a scowl.

“You’re still wearing your shirt,” Karma said as they fell.

“I don’t want to get cut by anything that isn’t sharper than my fingernails.”

“Even while he plummet into certain doom, Gakushu Asano manages to talk like he has a stick up his-“ he was interrupted by his body hitting the water. 

He only spoke again after taking a small crystal out of his pocket and putting it into his palm.

“Ass.”

Gakushu had done the same.

“I’m hurt. I wonder how you have friends your majesty. Maybe that’s why you had to find someone from the opposing side of the war,”he shook his head, starting to swim towards a large coral reef, “couldn’t find anyone local to deal with you?”

“What can I say? I’m not for everyone.”

They smiled as they swam forward, with determination in their eyes and swords forming in their hands. They were out to get the cause of the ten year long misunderstanding, and wouldn’t stop until they brought him to justice- well that or until it was past Gakushū’s curfew; whatever came first. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol should i expand this universe


	12. something to strive for (part one)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> literally it was to fill space but then i added on it lol i’ll be posting full chapter stories soon too i have three that I’m currently writing this is more of a note than a summary.

The setting wasn’t one he was familiar with. The tables were being wiped down by a lone caretaker, and the bar was being polished by a man wearing a mask. It was enough to send chills up Karma’s spine, not that he’d admit to being scared though.   
  
He didn’t know how he ended up there, everything after high-school was a blur. He could remember getting his dream job, then everything going south when he took down the assassin that was sent to kill the prime minister. He had been kidnapped after then, by the same people who were out to kill one of the top government officials. Then he escaped- and three months later he received an invitation to meet with the people responsible for the scar under his left elbow. He was there to give them hell.   
  
He walked through the golden doors and down the stairs into a room beside what looked like a cellar. He had a gun prepared in his belt, with a few bullets he intended on putting into the head of whoever ran this cruel organization. He walked into the final room which was illuminated in soft red lights.   
  
Like in the movies, the big bad guy seemed to be a large and scary man, though Karma couldn’t be sure because his back was turned to the door.   
“Who are you?” Karma asked, standing with his fists clenched at the end of the room in front of the big desk. The next words caught him off guard, and he was sure that if someone had attacked him during that time; they would’ve succeeded at killing him.   
  
“Akabane,” a pause that lasted for what seemed like longer than the decade they’d spent apart, “your voice is lower.”  
Karma was frozen in place. In shock. He stated at the back of the large chair like his life depended on it, he stated at is with such an intensity that it reminded him of when he used to stare at..  
“Asano?”   
“I’m glad I’m memorable.” Like hell he was.  
 _  
“I’m scared,” the figure in the hospital bed told Karma who stood right in front of him.  
“It’s all uphill from here Shū,” he managed to put a smile on his face._

_  
“I’m so scared,” Gakushū’s voice shook. He had an hour left. One more hour. An hour left with everything familiar._

_  
“I’m with you. Alright Gakushu? I’m right here, I’m always right here,” he_ _said as he ran his fingers through Gakushu’s hair._

_“You can’t come with me where I’m going Karma.”_

_“I’d follow you to the ends of the earth okay?” He pulled Gakushu closer to hug him._

_“I won’t be on earth.”_

_“Don’t say that.”_

_“I love you,” not much was said after that. Then, nothing else could be said; not after the flatline. Or so Karma thought._

“I watched you die.”

“Oh that was you?”

”What the hell Asano,” he was irritated now. Did he not remember him? What about everything they had done together? What was Gakushu even doing now. He looked out of place to Karma, sitting in some kind of throne built on murder and whatever else they did. 

“Do you know why you’re here? Akabane?”

”I don’t want to talk to you,” well that wasn’t completely the truth. He did want to talk to Gakushu, at least the one that he knew. Not this guy.

“Does it look like you have a choice?” He sounded irritated. It was familiar to Karma, the condescending sound of Asano’s voice directed to him, but this time it sounded different. Maybe it was something that changed with time. 

“I always have a choice.”

”I never took you as suicidal, at least take a seat before snapping your neck,” he gestured towards the leather seat in front of him.

”This is hardly the time for a date,” Karma rolled his eyes. Little by little he was replacing the dying boy beside him a few years ago with this terrifyingly cruel young man. 

“Don’t flatter yourself. We have a lot to discuss, and unless you want to embarrass yourself by taking the seat when your legs ache,” he gestured towards the seat again, “sit down.” Karma sighed and shook his head.

’Oh Shu,’ he thought.

“So,” Karma started off again, after sitting down in the chair in front of his- well, his ex? “Where have you been? It’s been ten years.” They had been 15 at the time of the younger man’s death. A lot had changed since then.

“Since we stopped hanging out?” Karma blinked. Hanging out? He could remember doing much more than just hanging out with him.

”Sure.”

”I’ve been busy. Built this organization,” he explained, taking a bottle of whiskey out of the drawer of his desk.

”Always the business man.”

”Look,” Gakushu poured to glasses, “the only reason I called you here was because I was curious. If I didn’t call for you here you’d be dead. I know a lot of people who want you out of the picture,” he explained. His hand shook a bit as he poured the glass.

”Am I supposed to thank you?”

”You’re supposed to answer honestly,” he sighed, handing Karma one of the glasses, “and no I didn’t spike it.”

”Reading my mind,” Karma took the class and inspected it. What was Gakushu doing, drinking Irish Whiskey, offering it to Karma. Why was he curious? Did Karma hallucinate seeing his shaking hand?

”I want you to tell me,” he paused to drink, “and don’t lie. How do I,” he cleared his throat, almost as though this pained him to ask, “how do I know you?”

So all of that about Karma’s voice changing? Was that a bluff? Karma was confused. He took a sip. It tasted good. He took a breath.

”From before?”

A silence passed between them, with Karma wondering if this was a sick joke, and with Gakushu hoping to find out a bit more about his life. He needed to piece everything together. 

“Yes. Ten years ago you said. Explain it to me.”

”I didn’t think you were this heartless,” Karma had come to the conclusion that Gakushu was messing with him. It was easier to assume that than think that this man actually wanted to know how Karma saw their old relationship. To tell the story he’d have to open some old wounds. He squeezed his hand around the glass.

“Akabane. Whoever you knew back then,” he tried to phrase his words carefully, “isn’t entirely me.” What was that supposed to mean? Was he speaking metaphorically?

”You don’t say?”

”Tell me and I’ll clear your name,” oh so he was desperate.

”Promise?” He wasn’t stupid, he knew that if he didn’t get his name cleared he’d be a dead man before he got to help with the next elections.

”I promise.” 

He took a deep breath, thinking about where to start. In the back of his mind, Gakushu knew everything that he was about to say. He really believed that the man was messing with him, but the way he begged and promised to clear his name was worth retelling the haunting tale. 

“We met in junior high,” he started, “I beat you during finals, we went to the same highschool and then,” he let himself smile just a little. 

“And then?”

”And then...”

_”Asano?” Karma smirked, looking at the strawberry blond who had just been dropped off at the front gates by the former chairman. Karma had walked to school, excited for his first year of high school. Gakushu glared at him in acknowledgment(?)_

_“Akabane,” he nodded._

_”Ready to lose again?”_

_“That was a one time thing, failure doesn’t look good on me,” Asano retorted._

_”There’s nothing that doesn’t suit you Shū-chan,” thus the nickname was born._

_”You don’t seriously think I’m going to let you call me that,” he shook his head._

_”I don’t think you need to give me permission.”_

_”I think you’re insufferable.”_

_”In exchange you can give me a terrible nickname,” he shrugged and began to walk into the building. Asano followed him._

_“And give you that satisfaction? No thank you. You’re Akabane til the day I die.”_

_”That day will be a sad one Shū-chan,” Karma mused, “but yeah, we’ll see.”_


	13. We Don’t Need The Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karma and Gakushuu cross paths, how much has changed?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LOL what is proofreading? h e y y a l l i just bought 35 notebooks

“Hey.”

“Hello,” two words. Used to be three. 

It was odd that they ever met again, and that they did when they did. What did people normally do when they were thirty? Karma was sure that seeing their boyfriend from their teenage years wasn’t usually on the top 10 things people tried to get done that year, but he could be wrong. He had been wrong before. 

“What are you doing in Japan?” Small talk, but make it personal.

“I’m on vacation,” Karma expected that answer, and he half expected a wife and two children- probably twin girls, to come rushing to meet with the two of them soon. They never came though, and Karma was left staring at Gakushuu until it was a bit too awkward. “How are you?” He tried to break the silence. 

“I’m great thanks,” Karma smiled, rubbing the back of his neck. Gakushuu smiled back and nodded, ready to run say from the situation like he did a dozen years ago. Karma was just about ready to turn away and leave him again too, just about. “How long are you staying?” Now Gakushuu had a reason to stay- well in the conversation. 

“I don’t know yet, probably three weeks.”

“That’s plenty.”

“Mhm.”

“Well,” his tone was dismissive and upon hearing it Gakushuu understood why, he was about to turn again when, “are you busy?”

“Right now?”

“Yeah right now,” he played with his fingers in his pockets.

“No I’m just walking around,” the blond explained. 

“Can I join you?”

“Of course.”

Another excuse to stay. This time it was an excuse to stay close by, something they needed a little while back. Better late than never though :) The two of them walked in sync through the old park, not exchanging a single word. That was okay though, they could say something when they thought of something interesting to say. 

“So-“

“Hey-“

Some things never change. The two of them sat down on the same bench they had stargazed on fifteen years ago. Strange how the world appreciates its 360s. Coming back felt like they were mocking themselves, but they would take any kind of mocking if it meant more time. 

“What did you want to say?” Considerate of Gakushuu to put Karma first.

“You dyed your hair.”

“Nice observation, you didn’t do anything to yours.”

“Good,” he paused, “eye?” 

If only they could see themselves now. The witty and sharp tongued red devil spewing awkward broken phrases, and the tyrannical class president complimenting him? 

“Yeah, comfy bench,” that was a lie if Gakushuu knew one, it was comfortable, just not in a physical way. It was still cold and metal, but the nostalgia gave it a bittersweet aura, at least to the two of them.

“Very. Hey do you remember when we were sitting on this bench a few years ago and,” he paused. There was so much they did on the bench, what would he say? ‘When we kissed on the bench?’ ‘When we stargazed here?’ ‘When you told me you loved me?’ ‘When we held hands here?’ “my homework flew away.” Gakushuu released a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. 

“Yeah I do,” he chuckled a bit. 

Yeah, if only they could see themselves now. With a two person space between them and a dangerous amount of bitterness in the air. Gakushuu Asano, the passionate genius who decided he would be the one to confess, now sitting there shifting his feet. Karma Akabane, the bold one, and the first one to make a move, now scared to think out loud. 

“Those were some fun times,” Karma sighed, looking up at the sky that was turning a nice shade of orange. It reminded him of Asano’s hair in the sun, but it was too late to mention that, it wasn’t his turn to speak anymore. 

“The best of times,” Gakushuu agreed.

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,” Karma laughed to himself. 

“It was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness,” Gakushuu continued, smiling a bit and looking up from the ground. Karma raised an eyebrow. 

“It was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity,” funny how the quote made sense.

“It was the season of light, it was the season of darkness.”

“It was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair,” Gakushuu felt a shiver run down his spine.

“We had everything before us, we had nothing before us,” Karma said, turning to face Gakushuu for the first time in what felt like too long. Gakushuu looked back and smiled. It /was/ funny. 

Maybe if they could see themselves now, smiling awkwardly on the bench after reciting some Dickens. Karma Akabane, who hated English and nerds would definitely call himself one. Gakushuu Asano, who was known to be straightforward in everything he did would groan in disappointment of what he had become. 

“Do you want to come over?” The words were out of the blond’s mouth before he could think about them. 

“Over where?”

“I bought a house.”

“Oh, yeah sure,” Karma smiled; a part of him wishing he’d said, ‘take me to dinner first,’ or something like that. 

“Thanks, yeah, we can walk from here,” they got up, and Gakushuu wanted to point out the last time they had gotten off of the bench. It was cold that day, and right after they’d walked off, Gakushuu went to catch his plane. 

“Where’s your house?” They walked down the familiar street and Karma realized how the pebbles and the cement felt familiar under his feet, how the same company made it feel like Gakushuu had never left, how for a second it felt like they hadn’t grown up, and how he was too scared to point this out. 

“It’s my father’s house,” Gakushuu admitted. He had bought the house after his father mentioned he was selling it. 

If Gakushuu Asano, aged 16 could hear that, he would be baffled by the fact that he willingly entered his childhood home let alone buy it. Karma Akabane would just laugh, and say something about how even monsters like Gakushuu were effected by things like nostalgia. 

“Oh that’s nice, I already know the layout of you plan to attack and I need to escape,” that was too much. Karma mentally kicked himself for that. 

“I’m sure it won’t come down to that,” he had to stop himself from smiling. That was about when Gakushuu realized that for a moment, in this moment, it was almost like he really hadn’t left. He hadn’t started a company and Karma hadn’t dedicated his life to bettering his home country, instead they were boys walking home after a day at school. He noticed all of this- along with the fact that his father’s mailbox still made his stomach turn whenever he saw it— and that he was too afraid to say anything about it. What was he afraid of? He wished he knew. 

They made it to the house without many more words passed between them, and even sat down on the couch without so much as a, “so.” Gakushuu was sure to keep everything the same way, all the furniture was clean and the house was nicely kept while he was away, and the air even smelt like it did 12 years ago. 

“Couch,” Asano said, and Karma blinked. It was indeed a couch. A sturdy one. Karma knew it was sturdy because of the amount of times he had jumped over the back of it to sit beside Gakushuu, and because of how it held up even after their drunk night one Christmas eve. 

“Blue,” two could play at that game, the two word one. Gakushuu smiled a bit, remembering when him and his father purchased the blue couch. He was ten and his father took him to with him to the store after soccer practice. He picked the blue one because the black one looked tacky. 

“Cushion,” with that word dozens of memories flooded into both boys’ minds. Memories of pillow forts built lifetimes ago, and of cushion fights that ended with a twist.

“Fort?” 

If they could see themselves now, they’d smile. Karma would smile because they were one step closer, and also because he would get another chance to hit Gakushuu with a couch cushion. Gakushuu would laugh because maybe he didn’t turn out to be that much of a wimp. He did offer to build a fort anyways. 

“Of course,” Karma smiled, sliding off the side of the couch. Gakushuu did the same and they stripped all the couches in the room of their cushions and began to build in the middle after shoving the coffee table to the side. 

“Nest or dome?” They had two different types of forts in the last, one that would leave them with an open roof, allowing more air to come in and for them to lay down out in the open (it was usually used when Gakushuu’s father was away,) this was the nest. The other one would be a taller type of tower without a floor part for them to hide under if they ever needed space— or privacy, or less space but more them. (I forget what this sentence was about)

“Nest,” Karma decided. It wasn’t like Gakuhou was coming in anytime soon.

“Let’s see how efficient we are,” they got to work. 

They would laugh their heads off if they could see how hesitant their movements had become. Karma would stick his tongue out at how he jerked his hand away from Shuu’s after making brief contact, and Gakushuu would point out the look on his own blushing face 14 years into the future. 

“Not very then,” Karma chuckled, looking at their fort. It was a good thing that they were already taller as teens, so the two of them could still fit. They sat down, avoiding the middle and each others’ gaze. 

“It’s doable.”

“Since when do you settle?”

“I no longer have the luxury of thinking I can,” he laughed a bit, “change the world. Or this fort for that matter, so this is fine.”

“Well it’s fine yeah. Nice and spacious. I never realized there was enough space for us to spread you,” he blurted.

“Well that’s because,” he caught himself, “because it’s been a while.” ‘That’s because you’d jump on top of me after building it you idiot.’

“I guess. Maybe we shrunk.”

There they were, dancing around the topic of their past again. It was a game really, who could get closer to their shared memories without touching them. Who could be explicitly implicit. Who was the most ballsy.

“Movie?”

“Which one?”

“Not Shrek 13,” he had seen far too many advertisements for it and had people use their leaves to take their children to the premiere. 

“Noted. Frozen?” He smirked a bit and Gakushuu scowled.

“Frozen 2.”

“Frozen 2,” Karma nodded. 

Halfway through the movie, they found themselves lying down, singing along with their eyes closed. Karma didn’t want the movie to end, he didn’t want the feel of he blue couch cushions to go away. He didn’t want the smell of the room to go away, to be foreign, he liked this. He wanted to stay. Gakushuu wanted the same, but neither of them could find the words. 

‘I wonder what he’s thinking,’ Karma thought, stealing a glance at the younger man, ‘does he find it weird that I’m here?’

‘He wants to leave doesn’t he?’ Shuu bit the inside of his cheek, ‘I can’t have him leave.’ They turned to fully face each other at the same time, and started laughing. How could they not? They looked like they were about to tell the other that they were dying or something.

“Oh my god,” Karma said between small fits of laughter, “why did,” he trailed off.

“I don’t,” Gakushuu stopped laughing to stare, “I don’t,” he frowned but kept his eyes on the redhead. 

“You don’t?”

“Kno-“ the two of them froze. The door was unlocking and Elsa was singing about how she had finally found her place. Were they going to die? Karma was a bit rusty and Gakushuu hadn’t been in a dojo for 13 years. 

They didn’t know who started, but all of a sudden they were hiding under piles of cushions, fearing of their lives in the most manly fashion. 

“I thought this movie went out of style 20 years ago,” an all too familiar voice complained at the tv that seemed to be playing by itself. Had he forgotten that he didn’t live there anymore? He walked further into the house and noticed his cushions- Gakushuu’s cushions were missing. That was when Karma and Gakushuu realized the ridiculousness of their positions. They were huddled under teepees of cushions. Karma laughed and knocked the cushions down, Gakushuu did the same seconds later, and Gakuhou dropped the grocery bag he was still holding. “I though you boys went out of style 20 years ago,” he knit his eyebrows together in confusion. 

For once Gakuhou was helpful. He broke through the barrier of awkwardness built by 12 years apart with two phrases and one terribly funny disturbed look on his face. It really was as though nothing had changed. 

“Are you forgetting that you don’t live here?” Gakushuu finally asked, and Gakuhou groaned, picking some of the cushions up.

“Are you forgetting you’re a grown man? Who else would take care of the house?” Karma had yet to stop laughing. He had his face buried in his arms and found it hard to breathe. Gakushuu looked his way to scold him when he realized how utterly funny and coincidental this all was. 

“Just give me-“ Karma wheezed and Shuu threw a pillow at his body.

“Nope,” he threw another.

“One sec-“ Karma took his head out of his arms and took a pillow to the face, “HEY!” He grabbed a pillow himself and threw it a bit too hard. It bounced off of Gakushuu and onto his father’s face. The look in Gakushuu’s eyes afterwards said ‘RUN’ so that’s what they did. They ran through the room, avoiding the carrots that were being thrown at them and dashing up the stairs to Gakushuu’s old bedroom. 

Once they were in, Karma sighed and leaned against the door incase Gakuhou decided to sprint up and catch them— which was unlikely given his age, but Karma thought that nothing was past him. They sat there panting in silence until Gakushuu finally decided he had had enough of this.

“Remember when-“

“I kissed you here.”

For a second Gakushuu seemed annoyed that Karma stole his thunder, but the two men ended up smiling at each other, looking like goofs. 

“I remember,” the younger of the two sighed, getting up and offering his hand for Karma to take. 

“Do you remember when I broke your bed?” 

“Yes, it was not smart to jump onto it heels first.” They laughed a bit more and sat down on the bed Gakuhou had purchased after the incident. They could get used to this. Basking in what they could remember about their shared past, and forgetting about their worries. It was dark out and they decided without a word that Karma would stay over for the night, and by the look in their eyes, they’d be spending most of Gakushuu’s vacation time together. 

If they could see themselves now. Smiling like dorks looking up at the moon that had finally rebuilt itself. They would smile and laugh, because maybe they weren’t so incompetent and inept. 

Sure, they didn’t need the memories, but they wanted them. They also wanted to make a few more ;)


	14. Midnight Window

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> :0 WAIT THIS ONE ISNT AS PG I THINK U H DONT REED IF UR 12 :) 
> 
> TW: mature topics that are not limited to drugs, death, and other things. 
> 
> i’m hoping everyone knows what a brothel is

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why is my formatting always ugly 😭 anyways 😌 idk it’s 5am. i didn’t write this tonight tho but i probably wrote this at 3 sometime not too long ago when i was younger *stares into the distance* alright 5am brings out the dork in me. don’t reed if you don’t laik mature topics like things about trauma in the sex industry. wow this note took a turn. also i was reading the like two bookmarks on here and one of them was so cute like 🤩🤩🤩 thanks sm anyways yes

No one comes to the window out of boredom, and the window isn’t a place for saints. It’s a makeshift confession stand where sinners fall to their knees, begging, repenting, screaming. But it’s all done in vain. It was midnight and Gakushuu really doesn’t know what he’s doing there. 

“Yes?”

“Room 37 please.”

“He says he’s not taking anyone tonight,” it was a new voice at the reception now.

“Tell him it’s Shuu.”

Why was he nervous? It’s not like he hadn’t been here before, and it’s not like the redhead was a stranger to him. No one had followed him, and his identity was still a secret, so it was fine- right?

“He says to come in.”

“Thank you,” he smiled politely.

It took about three minutes to get to room 37 that was 21 rooms from the window, but every step felt like it dragged on forever. This place was anything but foreign to the blond, but something about it still made his stomach churn. If somebody told him he’d be out in the middle of nowhere at a place like this he’d laugh at you then go back to studying. Tim really was weird. 

“Third time this week,” the door was opened when he got there.

“Yes, hey,” Gakushuu let himself in.

“People are going to start thinking things.”

“I wasn’t followed.”

“I hope not,” Karma played with the corner of his blanket, not looking up at his blond companion. Gakushuu shh it the door and sighed, turning on the lights and then turning them off again.

“Remind me why your lights are red,” he went to turn the lamps on instead.

“To distract people from my hair, duh,” he threw a pillow at Shuu, “so you got lonely again huh?”

“Quite. I was also bored,” he sat down beside Karma, hugging the pillow that was thrown at him.

“You’re the most boring customer. You should see a therapist instead,” Karma joked, tucking himself in.

“You don’t mean that,” Gakushuu said quietly, looking at Karma who seemed as comfortable as ever.

“You’re right, I don’t.”

“Can I lie down too?”

“Ooh, someone wants to get under the covers~”

“Shut up and move,” Shuu rolled his eyes and kicked his shoes off then got under the bedsheets and laid down to stare at the ceiling.

“What will it be this time? Your place in the universe? Your dad? Your assistant? Ren? How terrible your hair looks when it isn’t-”

“I’m going to complain about you.”

Karma had heard it all before, and if it wasn’t for the pleading look in Gakushū’s eyes, he would’ve shut him down. 

“I hate seeing you here.”

“I know that. You aren’t the only one Shuu, just the most persistent.”

“Shut up. I’m ranting. You’re too smart for a place like this, and it’s dangerous to be doing what you do. How much are they even paying you? It’s not worth it, you look exhausted,” he was getting worked up, but decided to tone it down once he caught a glimpse of the look on Karma’s face, “sorry.”

“Yeah yeah.”

“It’s just the drive here is long.”

“You can just stop coming,” Karma suggested.

“I miss you.”

“You saw me two days ago.”

Karma had always been stubborn, but it was always about something reasonable. Gakushuu could remember him throwing a fit about how he should’ve been refunded for some ripoff gaming console and how he stayed there until the man gave him his money back. That was reasonable and honestly fun to watch, but this was something entirely new. Something Gakushuu could never understand. 

“I miss seeing you in the sunlight.”

“Clear your schedule or something and drive here during the day.”

“I miss seeing you outside, outside of whatever town this is.”

“Then call me on my off days gosh,” Karma turned to face the wall.

“I miss seeing you with other people! In public! At cafes!”

“I said I had off days. Stop being so pushy, I still see people.”

“I miss when you were a person too,” he snapped. The silence after that was unbearable. He could tell that he overstepped. Calling Karma irresponsible or an idiot for choosing this way of life was one thing, but stripping him of his humanity... no job was enough for someone to do that.

“I have to ask you to leave,” how he said it was quiet, unlike the Karma Gakushuu knew a few years ago. He said it with a tone Shuu had actually never heard before, not coming from the feisty redhead. When the blond didn’t answer, Karma insisted, “leave.”

“But-“

“If you don’t want, I don’t know, if you don’t want to do inhuman things with me then leave. What’s the point of complaining to someone like me? How do you even know I have a brain, for all you care I’m a body ready to break down after another guy comes in here and decides to put his hands down my-“

“Okay. I’m going,” Shuu sighed, biting his lip to stop himself from sobbing. Maybe he’d come back tomorrow. For now, he could tell Karma needed to be alone, and that it would be better for him to be alone. So he got up and left. Not another word to Karma. Not that night, and not ever again.

The midnight window is not the place you want to find yourself. Not ever. Whether you’re on the inside or out, it’s a vile place to be. 

“Room 37?”

“Unavailable.”

“Why?”

“He’s gone sweetie, you can try 34 he has a similar build-“

“What? What? What?”

“If you want a room with red lights then 14 has some but it’s a bit of a walk.”

“What do you mean he’s gone? Did he run away?”

“Oh heavens no, he popped a few pills, you know how it goes.”

“Did he leave anything?”

“Not a letter or a word. He did it after his shift last night, no one talks to him anyways. Kind of a weird kid if you ask me.”

The midnight window is a place Gakushuu never wanted to go to again. If he did, maybe Karma’s ghost would haunt him- well even if it didn’t, the memories still did.

\- why are my notes for this so long also i don’t think i like this one 🤔 can u tell i’m sleep deprived - i think i’ll be deleting the notes for this when i’m well rested -

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was the tone of this funky?? well hi i just reread like 5 of these one shots and i feel like i either haven’t improved or i’ve actually gotten worse at writing these??? but lol 5am check. this one was weird ;-; I have the continuation for some of the other things here tho it’s just a hassle to post. anyways, since my weenie is probably the only person here~ wow k maybe i’m too sleep deprived. ahem. steam. yeah i’ll stop while i’m ahead and end this note


	15. Maybe Next Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW: IMPLIED SUICIDE
> 
> Karma on a roof.

“And I thought you were beautiful, is that stupid?” He pushed a pebble to its demise, “maybe I’m stupid,” he thought about throwing something bigger off the edge, his phone maybe. “Nah, I’ve always been smarter than you,” he chuckled, lying down to face the red-orange sky. It was foggy out and the summer air was humid. 

Karma always found it generous that Asano chose to die on such an insignificant date. If he had tried to be symbolic and died on his birthday, then he would’ve ruined the holiday for one too many people. Always the people’s person. 

There were over a handful of moments where Karma wanted more than anything to join his friend, and this was one of them. He had even gone as far as to getting into and on top of the building the youngest Asano threw himself off of. 

“Did the impact kill you? Or did you pass out half way?” He was mumbling to himself, playing with another pebble in his hand. He had yet to decide this one’s fate. Maybe he’s take it down and place it gently on the concrete, maybe he’d leave it on the roof, or maybe he’d just throw it off. So many options. Karma rolled over to look down. It was quite a fall. Over ten storeys. “Did you regret it when you were falling in front of the twelfth floor? Maybe it hit you when you were just in front of the eighth? Did you suddenly become religious near the fifth? Were you in front of the second before you could blink?” 

He lay there for another thirty minutes, asking questions he’d never get answers to into the distance. Once he felt he overstayed his welcome, he smiled and got up on shaky legs. He took the pebble in his hand and decided to bring it down. He’d leave it somewhere nice for the next time he decided to visit the cursed building. He didn’t quite have time to die yet, no no, he had dinner plans. Maybe next time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it’s short but I’m starting to post all the insta posts rn :)) bTw it’s @akabanana.yum ahem what self promo at 5am- oh hi babe sorry i’m up

**Author's Note:**

> Lol so like :,)) idk i write these really late to help me with my writers block Because they’re short and they’re based off of short quotes I see on pinterest most of the time :,) they might be ooc idk but i thought some of these were cute :)


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